I am addicted to People magazine. From the time I was about 13 or 14, I spent first allowance, then baby-sitting then waitressing money on a copy of the magazine. When I got married, I continued buying it, for richer or poorer, no matter how much money I had at the time. Like I said, it's an addiction. I know so much trivia about people I will never meet it's ridiculous but I can't stay away. I don't smoke, shop a lot or do drugs so it is a vice my husband will have to deal with.
Anyway, the Aug. 9 issue features a photo of actress Kirstie Alley on the front with the headline "Livin' Large." Apparently Alley now weighs 203 pounds and is due to star in a reality show about herself. First, I think it is sad that being 203 pounds is news. Second, I guess she is thumbing her nose at Hollywood by agreeing to be on such a show.
After all, Hollywood supposedly sets the standard for female beauty. Yeah, right. On the same cover is a photo of an anorexic Mary-Kate Olsen and an equally emaciated Paris Hilton. This is beauty? I had to smile, though, when I opened the magazine and found a photo of actress Sandra Bullock in a bikini on the beach with her boyfriend. Can anyone say cottage cheese? You've got to give credit to a woman who looks like that in a tiny bikini but doesn't care.
I have a bigger problem with her boyfriend, described as being the estranged husband of a porn actress. I think I would be in fear for my health by being in such a relationship with someone married to a woman who, by virtue of her job, has numerous multiple sex partners. Makes me want to take a shower and get a penicillin shot just writing that.
Turning the page, there are shots of Britney Spears with her fiance, music legend David Bowie recovering from heart surgery, and Sean Combs with one of his many children by how many women? I read about Britney getting engaged and being so proud of her ring. Since she is marrying a back-up dancer, can we assume she paid for the gorgeous platinum rock? Good to see David Bowie getting along OK.
There is a photo of some actor named Chris Noth. Who is this guy? Apparently he is so popular that he couldn't get some private time with the Western Wall in Jerusalem. He can come to my apartment and hug the wall there and no one will bother him, I assure you. How many of you even know who he is? How was he recognized in Jerusalem?
Here is an article about Nick Carter and why he split with Paris Hilton. I have no idea who he is and only know her because she is part of the family that Elizabeth Taylor married into for the first time and who is responsible for the hotel where I spent my wedding night. And here is Ben Affleck again, most famous for not marrying Jennifer Lopez. He is a huge Democrat supporter. Does anyone really care what he thinks politically?
Speaking of Lopez, there is a spread on her 35th birthday celebration with tacky photos of how she spent previous birthdays n with Affleck, Combs and on a movie set.
Wait, here is a story I like, a feature on superb actor Denzel Washington. I really like him and he's about to turn 50 in December, according to People. A good-looking, talented, smart family man who loves his wife and kids, it doesn't hurt that Denzel also possesses a strong faith in God.
I realize I am getting old when there are fewer and fewer celebrities on the Passages page that I recognize, except in the Deaths section. Oh, here's a feature I can't pass up n matching the celebrity to his or her tattoo. Wow.
I have to say I am not a fan of tattoos. In my generation, you only got a tattoo if you were in the Marines, prison or a biker gang. Now my kids' generation is different. Three of my four kids have a tattoo. I don't like it but they are grown and don't answer to me anymore. My husband's brother got a tattoo of his wife's name on his upper arm. Then they divorced. When he remarried, he had a bigger tattoo inked over with his new wife's name replacing Wife No. 1. I thought that was so silly. Now that he's single again, will he re-ink if he remarries again?
That just about covers my interest in this week's People. If you haven't read it, pick up a copy and amuse yourself for 15 minutes.
Kathy Jefcoats covers public safety in Henry County. She can be reached at (770) 957-9161 or by e-mail at firstname.lastname@example.org .