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Don't lose your sense of humor - Ed Brock

I've found my punchline.

Unfortunately for Robert Merrill, the one reader who submitted a suggestion (three, in fact) I came up with the punchline on my own. Sorry, Robert, but as you will soon see the one that came to me was a little more fitting.

For the entire joke, read last week's column. But to sum up, a minister takes his congregation on a picnic, let's God pick the spot but he is then attacked by bees.

He runs back to his group that is still walking across the field and shouts at the two old maids who are leading the group "Get the flock out of here."

Now here's the punch line.

"One old maid turned to the other and said "You know, I'm about tired of his sh?, ahem, ahem, sheep references."

Eh!? Eh?! Not too shabby, huh?

Well, kudos to Robert anyway for his amusing entries and he can feel free to stop by for an honorary paper clip.

So, maybe jokes aren't your thing. How about a riddle?

Q: Why does Bush want to tear down Abu Ghraib prison?

A: To make it more closely resemble our international reputation, of course.

And now the Republicans are making much about the supposed liberal propaganda coming out of Hollywood in the form of documentary filmmaker Michael Moore's "Fahrenheit 9/11" and some flattering documentary on Sen. John Kerry by the guy who made "Pumping Iron."

Guys, it's not the liberal movies playing in the theater that are influencing my vote. It's the scenes of this unnecessary, ill-managed war in Iraq playing on my television screen every night that has me eager to dump Herr Bush.

And speaking of movies, what is up with this "The Day After Tomorrow" nonsense, or as I like to call it, "Independence Day II: Attack of the Cold Front."

Global warming is a bit too serious an issue for us to exaggerate it into a summer blockbuster. Of course, that doesn't mean I won't go see the movie.

I mean, it shows New York getting hit by a tidal wave. That's just cool, man.

And don't you find it interesting that as a culture we are fascinated with the possibility of our own destruction? It's almost as if we long for it so we can be freed from the awful burden of driving to work each day.

I've got to run now. While this column is supposed to run the day after Memorial Day, I'm writing it well in advance so the wife and I can go camping in Savannah.

Of course, if the second ice age hits while we're down there I guess I won't be coming back. But, then again, you won't be reading this, either, so I suppose the whole thing's a moot point.

Ed Brock covers public safety and municipalities for the News Daily. He may be reached at (770) 478-5753 ext. 254 or via e-mail at ebrock@news-daily.com.